“Last seen 1985!”
“When you are on a 1% battery anyone who sends a message Or calling, Becomes the enemy Automatically.”
“I love my job only when I’m on vacation.”
“Life is too short smile
while you still have teeth……”
while you still have teeth……”
“God is really creative, I mean.. just look at me every time
.”
.”Best Funny Status
“Common sense is not so common.”
“Never laugh at your wife’s
choices… LOL..you’re one of them…”1
choices… LOL..you’re one of them…”1
“All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.”
“Never Steal because Government HATE COMPETITION.”
” I pretend to work and They pretend to pay me.”
“If you can’t convince them then Confuse
them.”
them.”
“I always learn from the mistakes of others who take my advice. That’s called EVIL
MIND.”
MIND.”
“I Am gonna Make my Status High, better you too Focus on your Status only.”
“I hate people who steal my ideas before I think of them.”
Funny Status Quotes
“AwesoME ends with ME and UGLY Starts with YOU.”
“People say everything happens for a reason. So when I Beat your ASS, remember I have a reason.”
“People said to follow your dreams so I went back to bed.”
“When Phone on silent mode
– 10 Missed calls…When Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day.”
– 10 Missed calls…When Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day.”
“Busy at this moment…free forever.”
“The only time success comes before work is in dictionary.”
“If time does not wait for you, don’t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.”
“DOESN’T EXPECTING THE UNEXPECTED MAKE THE UNEXPECTED EXPECTED ?”
“Behind every great man, there is a surprised woman
.”
.”
“Doing nothing is very hard thing to do…you never know when to finish.”
Best Funny Quotes
“You have the perfect face to become Radio Jockey.”
“Totally available!!!! Please disturb me!!!!”
“Hi there! I am using my brain.”
“One day your princess will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions.”
“I have enough money
to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something.”
to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something.”
“Looks like I over-estimated the number of your brain cells.”
“Lie is just a great story ruined by truth.”
“If Monday had a face, I would punch
it.”
it.”
“My style is unique don’t even think to copy it!”
“Teachers call it cheating, students call it teamwork.”
“I always dream of being a millionaire like my friend!… He’s dreaming too.”
“My bed is always extra comfortable when I need to get out of it in the morning.”
“Don’t Hit Kids, They Become Smart Nowadays they Carry GUNS
.”
.”
“A man
is as young as the woman
he feels.”
is as young as the woman he feels.”Top Fun Status
“I’m just having an allergic reaction to the universe.”
“When I actually die some people are going to get really haunted after me.”
“The winner of the rat race is still a rat.”
“If money
grew on trees, then girls would be dating monkeys….”
grew on trees, then girls would be dating monkeys….”
“Please don’t interrupt me while I’m ignoring you.”
“At least Some Mosquito’s are attracted to me.”
“I am sure I have a defective iPhone, I keep pressing the home button and I’m still at work.”
“I WANT TO KILL THE HOTTEST PERSON ALIVE… BUT SUICIDE IS A BIG CRIME!”
“I had to take sick day.I’m sick of those peoples.”
“Today’s Relationships is like You can touch each other but not each other’s phones.”
Best Funny Status
“DO YOU EVER JUST LIE ON KNEES AND THANK GOD THAT YOU KNOW ME AND MY INTELLIGENCE…??”
“TRUTH: Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up…”
“It’s not that I hate anyone; it’s just that I do not like people.”
“Life is Short so Chat Fast..”
“My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. What a TRAGEDY.”
“Save Paper, Don’t do Homework.”
“A black cat passing by the crossroad can stop hundreds of people what a RED LIGHT on traffic signal has failed to do for a long time.”
“I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I am blaming you.”
“Your status won’t ever match my status neither in WhatsApp nor in reality.”
“My wife
dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.”
dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.”
“Save Water, Drink Whisky.”
Funniest Whatsapp Status
“Sometimes all you need is love. Lol, just kidding, you need money.”
.”
“WARNING!! I know karate…..and some other words too.!”
“Honest people can be put into two categories….little kids and drunk persons.”
“Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari
, the alarm woke me up.”
, the alarm woke me up.”
“When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you ?”
“I just need a good Wifi & Wife.”
“I only need three things in life: Food, Wifi, Sleep.”
“There’s only one problem with your face, I can see it.”
“I’ve had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.”
“AFTER GETTING DRUNK, BACHELOR OF TECHNOLOGY TURNS INTO MASTER OF PHILOSOPHY.”
“Can’t talk, telepathy only!”
“Read books instead of reading my status!”
“People that Change Love status after 30 Sec… GF
is the Reason…”
is the Reason…”
“I am Cool but Summer Days make me hot.”
“I AM NOT A VEGETARIAN BECAUSE I LOVE ANIMALS; I AM A VEGETARIAN BECAUSE I HATE PLANTS.”
“GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.”
“I love you, and it’s killing me.”
“A fine is a tax for doing wrong & A tax is a fine for doing well.”
“I’m not sarcastic, I am just intelligent beyond your understanding.”
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